LF feedback on my first finished story (3102)
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Snuffalufaguz
1d ago
Hi friends! I'm new here, but I've been a long time academic writer. Lately, I've been trying to work on my creative writing side and finally finish something. I'd love to get some feedback and authentic criticism on my first completed story. It's been ~20 years of trying, if not more, and there's finally a finished product. Here's a link to it -- (3102 word count). Also, definitely looking for some semblance of a writing community if anyone has any direction or can help guide me a bit. Thanks! ? submitted by /u/Snuffalufaguz [visit reddit] [comments ..read more
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The Uncertain Hour (feedback appreciated)
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/samuelH-H
1d ago
Raven circles in the sky several times, lands on a tree branch and stares at The Sun. In the brush, insects hold back their creaky song, the wind hesitates, then drops, the clouds still. Beneath the earth, roots curl up like worried toes. Between Raven and Sun, time frays; a taut band ready to snap. Nothing moves. Raven stares at the Sun with one eye, a black pip; the Sun stares back, arrogance on fire. Then at last, the Sun slinks away behind the hills. Triumphant, Raven cracks its neck before taking off into the settling dusk. Everything breaths. In the brush, the insects strike the first n ..read more
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"Love, Emma" - feedback!
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Pythonic456
1d ago
A short story from the writing prompt: "a someone who is in denial". My first proper short story! I'd love some feedback. Do not be afraid to tear it to the ground if need be ? but I would also love to know what I did right, so that I can do more of that. Thank you! "Love, Emma" Words: [1829] “Love, Emma”, I whisper, as I inscribe the final words on this letter. I put down my pen, and glance over at the white clock. Odd, I thought I had a wooden clo - my thoughts were interrupted by a meow. Confused, I rub my eyes, to find I’m looking at my cat. I have been writing for too long, clearly. Bedt ..read more
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Character meets mentor-figure -
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Ok-Knowledge4018
1d ago
Attempting to show emotion and woven in dialogue Use of adjectives instead of adverbs Avoiding sticky sentences I would love feedback on the points above and how it reads Word Count 676 As I contemplated the windows, and the dream-me placed fine chocolates on layered glass trays, a woman stopped in front of the shop and looked at me. I gazed into my sweet future, startling as I realised I had vacantly stared at her. She was lithe and tall, not that I wasn’t tall, but I never managed to achieve the refined, aristocratic look which came with a slender figure and right now that made fidgety. I s ..read more
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A Moment Of Clarity [390]
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/versevirtuoso_
3d ago
Last night, I awoke abruptly at 3 AM, the silence around me accentuated by the quiet hum of the refrigerator and the distant ticking of a clock. In that moment, a wave of clarity washed over me, stark and sobering. The realization that I was alone, profoundly alone, settled into my consciousness. The solitude felt heavier in the stillness of the night, a stark contrast to the bustling days filled with fleeting interactions and superficial connections. My thoughts began to spiral, each one more pressing than the last. The ticking clock seemed to echo my growing anxiety. Time, that ever-elusive ..read more
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Kid/Teen Book
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/PurchaseHumble8405
3d ago
Hello, My daughter and I play this game about an evil being who wants to destroy the world and she has the powers of the fairies and elves. (play fighting and she's 4) but lately at bed time we have both been building on this world introducing new characters and events. I am wanting to write a story I can read to her at night about this world we have made up over the last few months. if someone could give me some feed back on the current state and flow (never written a short story before) The Battle of Brenok. "We are here to assist Lyra," Ember declared solemnly, her wings shimmering with de ..read more
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Short Story Feedback [4300 words]
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/JakeBob22
3d ago
Hello! I'm looking for feedback, especially from gay men, Australians, and anyone from the UK (but I'll take anybody's critique!) on my short story titled Omnigaedria. This story is meant to be funny and sweet, but also philosophical to a degree. What I am specifically looking for: For the demographics above, is there anything overtly offensive in a way that doesn't come across as clearly just for fun? Is the humor coming out? Do you feel invested in the Programmer and the other characters? Does the ending work for you? Also, my first draft was probably about a thousand words shorter. Does th ..read more
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Opening scene
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Ok-Knowledge4018
3d ago
Opening scene for a story - nothing planned yet, just a writing exercise after a long break. Word Count: 827 How is the scene setting? How is the writing in general? Thanks for feedback. Life doesn’t change in an instant, neither do your goals. Instead, they do so without you noticing it. Like knowledge, they change in increments, year by year, one grey hair at a time. I realised this only after finishing a master’s degree in arts, while trying for an archivist position in the local museum, and finding out these positions were not only rare and highly desired but also held for life. Once such ..read more
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Please critique my poem
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Ok_Term_5845
3d ago
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RoyB_bSKAALVmbIS1KLv733sNfXqG93Ci_GZ6-6_SyM/edit?usp=sharing submitted by /u/Ok_Term_5845 [visit reddit] [comments ..read more
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So I'm a underground rapper and song writter
Reddit » Writers' Group
by /u/Huge_Operation_227
5d ago
What's good yall.. I've been rapping and writing music since 16 years old and I'm 39 now.. I'm as fever as ever but realistically would not even approach the entertainment game as is tryna rap.. I still write music with several hooks amd verses and as of late I have recently recorded a song called code breaker that I actually wrote and edited and mastered it myself in which prior, I was just the rapper and writter.. I was a known trapper and lived a street life for pretty much all my life though I kept a job and got my education I still never took any of my talents serious because I was to bu ..read more
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