Today it is ten years ago since Oscar celebrated his last birthday.  I have just spent an hour looking at that sentence and crying. I needed a good cry. Life is going fast at the moment and I haven’t given myself time to sit down and just miss my boys. My body is in a constant state of tension and nothing I do makes it relax – so the last resort is crying. Maybe crying can release all this tension, so I am now torturing myself looking at old pictures and crying. Crying when I look into the beautiful eyes of my son: his eyes happy, his eyes when puzzled, his eyes when determined and his e ..read more

Ten years after his mum died of a brain tumour, and one year after starting his role with OSCAR’s, our Charity Manager, Phil Martinez, shares why the charity is so important to him. I have had ten years without a mum. Patricia Martinez-Williams, died in 2013 on my son’s birthday, aged just 66, of a brain tumour, just under a year before Oscar died of the exact same. She was everything you want a mum to be: kind, strong, loving, funny – and mine. Well, I say mine, but she was everyone’s because she gave of herself to the whole community, whether it be working for charity or in schools or as a l ..read more

I don’t think I have ever felt more alone than I do right now. I shouldn’t as I have plenty […] The post 18 Years appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

Travelling was always a major part of mine and Ian’s lives. We prioritised seeing new places, meeting new people and […] The post HOLIDAYING AFTER TRAUMA appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

I am sitting in peace and quiet for the first time in a very long time. This past weekend was […] The post GIVE IT HEART, GIVE IT MIND, GIVE IT SOUL, DON’T STOP! appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

The boys and I have settled really well in Copenhagen but a tiredness has also descended on me. I struggle […] The post IF YOU GET TIRED, LEARN TO REST NOT TO QUIT appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

It’s come round to Christmas already and this is our first since Milo died. I miss Milo every single day […] The post Feeling Lucky At Christmas appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

I can’t sleep. It is rare that I can’t sleep, even with all the worries of illness throughout time, I […] The post REGRET IS SCARIER THAN CHANGE appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

Pain is a subjective thing I guess. People talk about the most painful thing that’s ever happened to them, childbirth […] The post When All We Do is still Not Enough appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more

I never knew what scanxiety was until last year when Milo started treatment. When Oscar was diagnosed and ill, I […] The post SCANXIETY appeared first on OSCAR's Paediatric Brain Tumour Charity ..read more