My Opera Dream Came True
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
1w ago
When did I first long to be in the audience at New York City’s Metropolitan Opera? I can’t say exactly, but the desire was probably born in 1967, the year I moved to Santa Fe, New Mexico. Our city boasts a fine company, Santa Fe Opera, and I’ve never missed attending their productions. Wonderful, but not the Met. During not-so-long-ago months of the Covid lockdown, most nights found me watching HD Met Opera productions on the computer. Along with thousands of other opera buffs, I found my spirits lifted, worries forgotten. I imagined myself there. This January during a visit to the East Coa ..read more
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Letting Go of the Perfect Holiday
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
1M ago
By: Emily Shirley We have all seen the Folgers commercial where the big brother comes home from college and starts making coffee. As the coffee smell reaches upstairs, the family comes down to greet him. They are all smiles in the perfectly decorated home with this perfect holiday moment of love all around and… well, perfection. In other Christmas commercials, the adult children with their perfect families drive up, all smiles and carrying gifts. The food somehow magically appeared without anyone shopping for days, standing on their feet preparing for hours, and stressing over. I have been gu ..read more
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Reading the Nights Away
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
1M ago
There is no friend as loyal a book. — Ernest Hemingway Outside of a dog, there’s no friend like a book. Inside a dog, it’s too dark to read. — Groucho Marx Winter days are short and the evenings long. Here in the high desert country of New Mexico, it’s bitterly cold. Snow is predicted, temperatures below twenty degrees. The weather tells me to relax by the fire with a cup of tea and a good book. I’ve neglected a multitude of quotidian household chores to delve into some waiting volumes. Lately, I’ve decided that chores can wait. Below, a few books that turned me into a couch potato. Taking Fli ..read more
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Ruminations and Rumi
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
2M ago
November is National Adoption Awareness Month. I’ve been increasingly aware of my own growing acceptance of the old issues and my continuing transcendence, rising above old ways of thinking. Rumi’s poem “The Guest House” describes my emotions perfectly. My aim is to be welcoming to all feelings. Easier said than done, but if I succeeds, I will have accomplished a lot. The adoptee’s journey is about being at home in ones own skin. Although he wrote seven centuries ago, the Persian poet, theologian, and Sufi mystic Rumi provided insights that serve us well today. The “guests” are emotions and th ..read more
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Follow the Yellow Leaf Road
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
3M ago
October gave a party; The leaves by hundreds came: The ashes, oaks, and maples, And those of every name. — George Cooper: “October’s Party” Check the thermometer. Mercury dips; outdoor plants must be moved inside; leaves blow away in gusts of chilly wind; an icy rain splatters intermittently. Even though being outdoors becomes a bit more challenging, Fall hiking is one of my favorite activities. Thich Nhat Hanh said “When you walk, arrive with every step. That is walking meditation. There is nothing else to it.” Scene: Santa Fe National Forest Last Friday, my friend Mary and I chose the Borreg ..read more
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Meandering Around Maine: Monhegan Island
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
4M ago
[Monhegan] seems to have power — as the Irish say about some beauty spots in Ireland — of casting a spell over you. You either like Monhegan or you don’t like it. But if it casts its spell over you – then you are its lover for life. That is what it did to S.P. Rolt Triscott.  — A.J. Philpott: Boston Sunday Globe, 19 March 1939 Six days of the Sierra Club trip had passed. It was our last morning in Camden, Maine. Fortified by peach-stuffed french toast, we bid farewell to Maine Stay Inn hosts, Peter and Janis. A short drive south brought us to Port Clyde to catch the daily ferry to Monhega ..read more
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Meandering around Maine: Camden
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
4M ago
Opening picture: Waterfront in Camden ~ Afternoon on the Gulf of Maine How wonderful to “adopt” a new place on the planet!  Since before the Pandemic, I’d not traveled anywhere except California to see the grandkids It was time to break out of the rut. A friend and I just returned from a Sierra Club trip billed as “Jewels of the Maine Coast.” Guided by two Sierra Club leaders, Rochelle (from my home town of Santa Fe) and her co-leader Gail (a Maine resident), the first part of our vacation included Camden and environs. Daily hiking was the theme, but our week was enriched by cultural and ..read more
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Coming Home to Myself
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
5M ago
‘This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.” – Polonius in WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE’s “Hamlet” ************************************************************** How can you be true to yourself if you grew up not being allowed to know who you are? As an adoptee, hiding behind the mask of being “normal,” of masquerading as the “real” daughter, I could never live my life authentically. Early on, I assumed that there was something shameful about not being born to my mom and dad. The best way to behave was to strive for per ..read more
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More than a Memoir
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
5M ago
Little Brother by Sallie Bingham “Again” is even sadder than “was” — it is the saddest word of all.” — WILLIAM FAULKNER, The Sound and the Fury Thus begins Sallie Bingham’s latest book, a powerful, poignant account of her younger brother Jonathan, his life and  untimely death. Part of the prestigious Louisville, Kentucky Binghams, the author depicts her family’s life, one of wealth, accomplishment and privilege. Jonathan, adored by his sister, was of a loose thread in the tapestry. The family comprised a socialite mother, an involved-in-politics father, and five children. The children we ..read more
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Guatemala Gift: Part Two
The Goodbye Baby | Adoptee Diaries
by elainepinkerton
6M ago
CHAPTER TWO-by Kim Straus Jose steps into his new life Remember my saying that we as older soon-to-be dads were not prepared to take on the special needs of a special needs child?  And don’t get me wrong, I’m in awe of those parents who do and I’ve met adoptive parents who have raised multiple special needs children.  Well, we quickly learned of José’s special need. José arrived in New Mexico sound asleep in his umbrella stroller.  He and Jack were met at the airport by me, Jack’s Albuquerque cousins, and our good friend and my boss, who would later become José’s godmothe ..read more
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