Why embracing all emotions is important to raise happy, emotionally healthy individuals The following is an extract from my book ‘How to Raise a Teen’. Although this is from a book specifically about teenagers, the concept ?of emodiversity applies at any age: What is emodiversity? Raising young people in a home that fosters the importance of embracing all emotions –a concept known as emodiversity – has a protective effect on mental health and can help them to feel more confident. Research has found that those who experience more emotions are significantly healthier, not just mentally but physi ..read more

Parenting is a constant balance between ‘holding on’ and giving in to our child’s intense needs for attachment and security from us and ‘letting go’, mindful that our ultimate goal is for them to become a confident individual, with good self-esteem, ready to fly in the world alone. As our children get older and start to reach for independence it can be tempting to over-protect them and become a ‘snowplough parent’ (a parent who clears the way of any obstacles), or a ‘helicopter parent’ (one who hovers and micromanages everything). Parents who fall into these styles are often nurturing and wel ..read more

Hi everyone, It’s been a busy time recently and now it’s finally publication week! ‘How to Raise a Teen’ is officially published on Thursday and I thought I’d do a quick round-up of news and giveaways surrounding it. Demetrescence – the second transition of a mother on Woman’s Hour Last week I was lucky enough to be a guest on Woman’s Hour, discussing the transition that mothers of teens go through, a little like Matrescence (the new motherhood transition), Demetrescence is the metamorphosis that mothers of tweens and teens transition through, which changes them in body and in mind. Link to li ..read more

Matrescence — the term used to describe the transition and metamorphosis that women go through during early motherhood is a hot word on the lips of those who work in the childbirth and maternity industry, women’s health experts, journalists and authors. Although the idea was first discussed by American anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970s (Raphael also introduced the word ‘doula’ to modern vocabulary), it wasn’t until a decade ago that the word made its way into everyday use after being reintroduced by American Psychiatrist Dr Alexandra Sacks. Today, if you following childbirth or parentin ..read more

“Gentle parenting is so hard, I’m not sure I’m cut out for it!” If I had a pound/dollar/euro for everytime I’ve seen this written online I would be a VERY rich woman by now. However it is totally and uttlerly WRONG. This sentence makes me incredibly sad and frustrated because it highlights how much people don’t understand what Gentle parenting is. In all of my work, I talk about long term goals versus short term goals. Quick fixes that change behaviour today, versus focusing on who your child will be as a teen/adult. Gentle Parenting is very much focused on the latter. It is not about creatin ..read more

“It’s their hormones!” If you raise a concern about your young person in a group of other parents, I can guarantee that within a minute talk will turn to hormones. If your young person is male, any difficulties you have will be blamed on the fact that their body is “swimming in testosterone”; if they are female, then their behaviour will be put down to “oodles of oestrogen”. Apparently, testosterone makes boys aggressive, rude and ‘boisterous’, whereas oestrogen makes girls sulky, erratic and rude, especially when it’s ‘the time of the month’. What if I told you that this isn’t true? In fact ..read more

The following is a short excerpt from my new book ‘How to Raise a Teen‘: Photo by Any Lane on Pexels.com Have you ever thought about the last time you did something with your young person (YP)? When they are little, we commemorate their firsts; first steps, first words, first solid food, their first pair of shoes and the first time they slept through the night. We take photos to stick in photo albums and share their pictures proudly on our social media. We call family and friends and let them know how exciting their new achievements are. Their lasts however either pass us by unconsciously, or ..read more

Ten important takeaways from ‘Because I Said So! why society is Childist and how breaking the cycle of discrimination towards children can change the world’: 1. Childism is discrimination based on age. The correct term should actually be ‘ageism’, which is a well accepted ‘ism already – but universally used to talk about the discrimination of the elderly. 2. We have all been affected by childism when we were children, we often don’t realise it though and just grew to accept that adults hold a position of power over children. Often our loved ones have been even more deeply affected than us and ..read more

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When I had my first child, in 2002, I struggled to follow the mainstream parenting advice of the time, particularly when it came to sleep. My son was easily the worst sleeper of all the babies I came across in the baby groups we attended. The other parents were able to put their babies down awake in their cots in their blacked-out nurseries, give them a quick kiss on the cheek, then walk out and close the door. Their babies were capable of the miraculous skill of ‘self-soothing’, while mine would cling to me desperately. He wailed when I put him down, his arms reaching up for me, big brown, te ..read more