Two Jewish women are walking down the street, and pass a Catholic church with a sign that says: “$200 to convert!” They discuss it and one of them decides, why not? She could use the money. She goes into the Catholic church, is in there for a while, and finally comes out: “I converted!” Her friend says, “Did you get the $200?” “Is that all you people think about?” “”””” Messianic Dating at MessianicMatchmaker.com to meet Messianic Jewish women and men ..read more

A man applies for a government job A guy goes into the Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?” He replies, “Yes, caffeine. I can’t drink coffee. ”Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?” “Yes,” he says, “I was in Afghanistan for one tour.” The interviewer says, “That will give you extra points toward employment.” Then he asks, “Are you disabled in any way?” The man says “yes, a bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles” The interviewer is shocked, but assures the man that his disability qualifies him for extra points. “You got ..read more

3 army generals bet who has the bravest soldiers. The first general calls one of his men and commands him: “You see that tall flag pole? Climb to the top of it and jump down.” The soldier is hesitant at first, but then begins to climb the pole. When he reaches the top, he jumps… but breaks a leg. The other two generals salute the man for his bravery. The second general calls a soldier and tells him: “See that flag pole? Climb it and do a front-flip onto the ground. The man climbs the pole and performs a flip, as the general wished. Unfortunately, upon impact, the soldier tragically breaks his ..read more

A German is on vacation in America. While driving he accidentally crashes into the car of an American. The American gets out, walks to the German and yells: “Are you blind or something? Can‘t you see where you‘re going?“ The Germans replies: “Calm down my friend. Let‘s have a quick drink to calm the nerves“ He grabs a bottle of schnapps and hands it to the American. The American takes a sip and hands it back. The German then puts the bottle back in his car. “Aren’t you gonna drink?“ asks the American. “No“ said the German. “I‘m waiting for the police to arrive“ “”””” Loco Domains has .com doma ..read more

Guy driving along the highway at 70mph, sees a chicken running along side keeping up. Crazy enough the chicken has three legs! Punches it to 80, chicken stays with it then cuts off down a country road. Guy follows it into the driveway of a farm, sees the farmer. “Did you see a three legged chicken speed in here”? “Yeah that’s mine. I breed them that way because me, my wife, and my son all like drumsticks” the farm tells the driver. “Wow that’s amazing how do they taste?” the guy asks. “Dunno” said the farmer “never caught one before”. “”””” Loco Domains has .com domains for only $10.99 ..read more

A farmer was in a bar drinking and looking all depressed. His friend asked him why he was looking depressed and he replied, “Some things you just can’t explain. This morning I was outside milking a cow. As soon as the bucket was full the cow kicked it down with his left foot so I tied up his left foot to a pole. I began to fill up the bucket again and he kicked it down with his right foot, so I tied his right foot to a pole too. As soon as I finished milking the cow again he knocked down the bucket with his tail and I took off my belt and tied up his tail with my belt. As I was tying up his ta ..read more

A policeman pulls a farmer over for speeding and proceeds to write him a ticket… The farmer notices some flies buzzing around annoying the officer. The cop is shooing flies more than he’s writing. The farmer says “I see you’re being bothered by those circle flies.” The policeman says, “If that’s what you call them, yes, they are somewhat annoying.” The farmer says, “Yeah, we call them that because we see them circling around the rear ends of horses.” The policeman says, “Hmmm. Did you just call me a horse’s ass?” The farmer says, “Oh, no sir, officer. I have way too much respect for those who ..read more

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice: picnic tables, horseshoe courts, a volleyball court, and so me apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond and look it over, as he hadn’t been there for a while. He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. He made the wome ..read more

A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there, he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him, and says, ‘Did you call for me?’ The man replies, ‘No, what do you mean?’ She says, ‘You must be new here. Let me explain. It’s a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me.’ Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her, and happily lets him have his way with her. T ..read more

One day, a man bought a lie detecting robot that would slap anyone who lies. He’s sitting in his living room when his son walks in the front door. The Dad asks, “Where ya been, son?” Son: “I went to watch the new kung fu panda movie.” The robot comes and slaps the son. Dad:”Son, the robot slaps anyone who lies, now tell me the truth.” Son:”dad, I actually went to watch an R rated film, I’m sorry,” Dad:”Is this how we raised you, son, watching filth in your age, I have never done anything like this in your age,” The robot comes and slaps the dad. Seeing this, the mom walks in and says “ha what ..read more